AKB Meerschaum: Carved Elephant (with Case) Tobacco Pipe

Elephants are kind of terrifying when you put them into perspective, as not only are they the largest land mammal on the planet, but they are also the smartest. Combine this with skin that's thick enough to stop most bullets and a pair of lengthy, sharp tusks, and you have a creature that could, were it given opposable thumbs, rival humans for dominance. Thankfully that's no issue here, as the regal and imposing creature is instead the handsome stummel of a strikingly carved meerschaum pipe from AKB, though perhaps it's best not to be smoked around its real-life brethren.