|
|
I'm a strong proponent of pipe tobacco and food. A bowl before lunch makes for an appetizing apéritif, a bowl after dinner the perfect nightcap. Taking the meal into consideration, the type of tobacco can make the pairing even better: the piquant nature of a Va/Per accentuates the spicy notes of curry, while the smoked flavor of BBQ makes an English mixture afterward all the more enjoyable. In the same way that certain drinks combine better with certain foods, so do different kinds of tobacco, depending on the meal at hand and the smoker's personal preferences.
At the same time, though, occasionally a meal has interrupted a pleasant smoke, or I've counted down the minutes while eating because I want to return to my pipe. I love food, but at the expense of smoking? No thank you. It's a problem. But what if we could combine the two?
Sure, there are more than enough flavored tobaccos. Mixtures topped with sweet, dessert-worthy notes. BriarWorks even has a blend that combines hints of bacon and bourbon. Where these all fail, though, is that one still must eat — tobacco doesn't fill you up; it provides mental, spiritual and philosophical nutrition, but no physical sustenance.
Imagine if it did. Imagine a blend that was a three-course meal, not only in flavor but in physical and nutritional satisfaction as well. Something along the lines of the gum prototype in the original Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory movie — the one with Gene Wilder, God rest his soul.
...tobacco doesn't fill you up; it provides mental, spiritual and philosophical nutrition, but no physical sustenance.
Obviously, I'm not advocating for tobacco to transform smokers into giant blueberries, but simply proposing that instead of sitting down to a plated dinner, eaten with a fork and knife, you could merely light up a bowl. In science fiction, a simple, single tablet has often provided all the calories necessary; tobacco is even more natural. The blend could start as a delicious caesar salad before transitioning into a warm, slow-cooked roast in the layering of the bowl, finishing with a sweet pairing of apple pie and vanilla ice cream. You'd be left full and satisfied and still in prime position to enjoy a digéstif bowl before bed.
The possibilities and flavor combinations would be endless. Never again would you have to struggle finding time for lunch and a bowl during your break — the bowl would be your lunch. Of course, there would be special occasions where a traditional, sit-down meal would be more acceptable, but overall there would be massive, beneficial implications. Talking while "eating" would no longer be an issue; grocery shopping would be revolutionized; cooking would be a thing of the past. Vegans would be delighted, cookbooks would become tobacco blending recommendations, and restaurants would become tobacconists. Instead of grudgingly pausing a bowl just to eat, packing a briar would mean dinner's ready.
You may also enjoy:
Comments
Sounds good to me. I find meal time a bother but packing my pipe a welcomed ritual.
I wonder what results layering a bowl with different blend types would bring. A Va/Per to start off, then an english, finished off with a bit of sweet aromatic, resembling a three course meal.
A pipe after any meal, or snack for that matter, suits me fine as well. But the perfect accompanying beverage I submit, with any blend, is cream Sherry, especially Solera cream Sherry such as those natively vinted here in Michigan.