Goccia Chubby Billiard Tobacco Pipe

Much as an object exceeding 768mph (at sea level) will trigger what is popularly referred to as a sonic boom, seeing a briar of this length and proportion will usually trigger a knee-jerk series of linked descriptive attributes, a series that I like to call the "Three C's"; "Compact", "Charming", and "Cute". Compact is a given, no one in the office who has seen this pipe has failed to call it charming. Cute? I think that depends upon whether you would consider former Mr. Olympia Franco Colombu cute. Maybe another way of looking at this pipe? If, in some bizarro universe, The Lord of the Rings Trilogy were recast using briars, this pipe would have to be Gimli. Hey, Gimli is one of my all-time Tolkien characters, but I wouldn't want to call him cute (at least without written permission).

--Bear Graves